Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12…”Two are better than one, because they have good return for their labor; If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

God has blessed my life with friends. All sorts and types of friends. Some forever friends, and some sent for important periods. Though for as long as I can remember back to childhood until now, I’ve always felt a sense of loneliness, God always provided someone to share it with. My first friend of memory was a girl named, Laurie Newsome. She lived next door to me. We were four. She was my first kiss. In my dad’s storage shed. I’ve had at least one close friend ever since. Usually many. Thank you, God.

One of them came to my house yesterday. We’ve been friends for well over 10 years now. He was coming to drop off his golf clubs for me to carry to Tennessee for him for an annual trip we go on together. That’s this weekend. He’s going through a major heartbreak right now – His mother is on her death bed. It could come at any time. It’s not a solid relationship because of her addiction. We share that bond in our mothers. For a time years ago, he and I were exactly what the other needed. For me, a good friend to spend time with in a place foreign to me. For him, an older friend to be an example on how to live successfully. We both got what we needed from that. We share a mutual respect for each other. His life moved into marriage, career, honors, and lots of travel. Mine moved into the places it is now. We get very little time together these days. This upcoming trip designed just for that purpose. Once a year. At least. There are many of us in that group – Friends for life.

When he arrived at my house I was in the driveway cleaning out my car. He pulled up and I had predetermined to be cheerful because I know he’s suffering. This is a guy with a huge heart, but a steely exterior, and he can be flat out cold as ice when he puts his mind to it. But around me, his friend, that shell always seems to melt. Both of his feet hadn’t even touched the pavement of my driveway before he started to tear up. He’s torn up about his mother. I’m his friend. He knows there will be no man-code silliness judgment from me. He controlled his tears, but they remained as we talked. I gave him a hug as he left and made sure he knows his friends are ready to pick him up. That’s as Godly a moment as it gets on earth.

Who are the people in your life that you depend on? Your friends. Do you make sure they know you love them? Do you give them the same friendship in return? Too much giving…too much taking…is not friendship. The ones that consist of mutual ebb and flow…those are your real friends. Love them. This world is awful lonely even with them. We need each other. “A cord of three strands is not easily broken.”

Gary Abernathy

(The above picture was taken in the early 1980’s in my driveway. I’m still friends with all 3 of them.)